Good Candy. Bad Candy.

There is something to be said about candy that is so bad that you love it anyway. Ever had a friend that you loved, even though he or she took you out and emotionally beat you up every time you spent a little time together? Same thing with bad candy. Or kinda something like that.

You need examples, don't you?

Here's one - take the Circus Peanut. Not the ultra delish banana flavored yellow ones. Or even the fruity flavored pink ones. We're talking the run-of-the-mill bag of orange blah. But take one out and eat it. Even when it's sliding into your mouth, you know it's nothing but some whipped up sugar, fake color and fake flavor. Even still, try to eat just one. You can't. Or maybe, it's just that I can't eat just one. It's possible that I'm the one that's confused here. Who knows?

Come to think of it, the name is even bad. I've never seen a peanut that is puffy, orange and flat on the bottom. And I've never seen them, bought them or eaten them under the big top. While at the circus, I'm not ever even hungry. Romanian sweat combined with elephant dung can do that to your appetite, if you know what I mean.

So you eat one and then try and stop. Can't happen. Every one you eat makes you just a little bit sicker. But you keep eating.

What else?

How about Licorice All-Sorts. Love em. Except for the little round puck of hard jelly that is covered with tiny pink b-b's. No one eats those. But the tall licorice and coconut sandwiches? Those are a can't miss, especially if you get the triple decker. But once again, eat more than 30-40 and you've got problems.

The list goes on and on...

Boston Baked Beans - I love 'em. My wife thinks I'm crazy.
Pseudo Boston Baked Bean with Humps / AKA Brown Gall Stones - Can't go wrong.
Snaps - A spiritual experience. Especially if they are powdery enough to blow out a little white dust from the hollow center.
Brachs Neopolitans - Take me back to grandma Pete's.
Candy Cigs - Great unless you burn the end, then it tastes like fried sugar. But if you're hungry you can eat it anyway.
Razzeles - Still the best "swallowing" gum, when you can find them.
Mini Chic-o-stick - A Halloween tradition that must live on.
Cherry Mound - If you've got a cavity, this sucker will hunt it down and make it hurt.
Salted Nut Rolls - The ultimate road trip candy bar. Chase it with a Cherry Pepsi and a handful of spicy pork rinds.
Cherry Halls - When you're hard up, these work like a charm until you hit the next Sev.

(Editor's note: My wife just told me that she's never eaten a cherry Halls as a treat.)